21 December 2005

'Tis the season to eat jelly

My scanner and I are parted until the New Year so I'm unable to present you with owt new and topical of a non-textual nature. Actually, I do have one new and vaguely presciently topical (as in it will be topical come January) thing but it's hopefully gonna be in a magazine so I feel it would be wrong to show it here before it's printed there. Whether or not it's printed there all depends on advertising - adverts are more important than comic strips so if somebody buys the space allocated to me I get spiked. I feel I've almost come over all vacuous meeja wanker using terms like 'goes to bed' and 'spiked' but I'm not sure what they mean.

Anyway, if I had a scanner handy I would show you the following:

- Berlusconi got it completely wrong - Finnish food is ace! I spent several hours of Sunday stuffing myself with Scandinavian Yule grub at the Scandinavian Seaman's Church in Liverpool and everything was fantastic and abundant. My favourite thing was rossoli (which Ms. Suomi-Suolmate is making for Christmas dinner, enjoyed on 24 December in accordance with Finnish tradition). I'm discovering that beetroot is a terribly unpopular vegetable for something so delicious and healthy. Even moreso than sprouts;

- the homemade potato print wrapping paper I shall spend this afternoon making (which has more to do with being a broke half-Yorkshire skinflint than owt else);

- the various pleasures of finally finishing the Lone Wolf & Cub saga almost 20 years after I first started reading it, stumbling upon Thursday Next and rapidly devouring every morsel of her adventures, watching The Man Without a Past on dvd and the BIG SCREEN (well, the slightly bigger screen of the Nordic Film Society in the basement of the aforementioned church), discovering that black-pudding tastes pretty good after all for something that's ostensibly a scab and, of course, my continuing love affair with Ms. Suomi-Suolmate. (I couldn't be arsed to provide links for the books and films so cut and paste the bold stuff into Google).

Before I leave you with some old and new delights for your eyes I would like to point out to anybody wealthy and philanthropic (or wealthy and seasonally drunk) that I have made an amazon wishlist and linked to it from my sidebar. I don't need anything from the list but all the items listed will improve the quality of work you receive here in one way or many.

In January this blogspot home of GoG is a year old and I shall mark the birthday the same way I marked the birthday of the original GoG - I shall reprint the Guild of Guestblogger contributions kindly donated by so many of my blogging chums. If anybody would like to add some new stuff to the visual smorgasbord, email me thus - guildofghostwriters (ampersand) gmail (dot) com.

So - the ghostwriters of Christmas past (sorry I haven't made time to do something new...):

boxing dayfb

And a small taster of the ghostwriter of Christmas present:

Merry whatever to all!

16 December 2005

The Inner Critic









(From September 2004 and still one of my favourites...)

15 December 2005

12 December 2005

Latest Card (New Stuff)


I meant to include this with the other post about cards but forgot to put it on the cd-rom I use to transport my stuff from home to library so it was temporarily excluded. Obviously, this was a housewarming card for Janne & Meri. Unlike Antti and Elina (the recipients of the cards in Wednesday's post), I have never met Janne & Meri and had to work from photographs. For that reason, it was pretty gratifying to find out that Meri, while otherwise thrilled with the card, noted that I had got her upTighT pose down to a 'T' and complained that Ms. Suomi-Suolmate must have been slagging her off (she hadn't - 'twas just happenstance, a mighty force throughout the universe). While I'm talking about Wednesday, I managed to whip a greed related strip up for the magazine brief I mentioned and have just emailed a lossy of it to the editor at the magazine so please cross your fingers/do whatever invokes your gods of good luck and deserved favourable fate on my behalf (no human or animal sacrifices though please). If they accept it, I'll post it up here once it's published. If they don't, you'll see it in the new year. For now, please excuse me while I go back to watching my mobile phone...

7 December 2005


(From September 2004, when I visited Liverpool and Gillingham and treated myself to some pastels...)





First Go With Gouache

(From September 2004 when I'd just got some gouache watercolours - and a Trojan ska box set...)


More Cards (New Stuff)

Most of the very little I've been doing lately has been customised cards for friends of Ms. Suomi-Suolmate. Here are a couple of recent examples:


Antti is in a band in Finland - quite popular over there and they even played the Cavern club here several times a few years ago (before I even knew they existed, sadly) - so this idea seemed an obvious one when I was asked to make a birthday card for him.


Elina has just completed her MA in Helsinki - the Finnish text on the banner says something like 'Helsinki University Graduation'. The MA has something to do with marketing but involved Elina interviewing loads of Nike sponsored sporty Finns, including various England based footballers. Elina is typical of many football loving Finns (ice hockey and beer drinking are the national sports of Finland) in that she fervently supports Liverpool FC. So all those elements conspired to conjur the above idea from my befuddled and neglected imagination when Ms. S-S wanted to congratulate Elina.

When I print the cards, I always incorporate this logo on the back:


If anybody out there has more money than sense and an impending special occasion, get in touch and I'll see what I can come up with. In the meantime I've just been briefed to produce something about 'greed' for a student magazine and my mind is drawing blanks...

11 November 2005

What am I doing?

I'm sorry there's been a bit of a hiatus. A visit to Doncaster accounted for part of it and since then I've been wondering what I'm doing. You see, posting old stuff doesn't really feel like blogging. If I was posting loads of new stuff then it might feel a bit more like blogging but I'm not making heaps of new stuff to post. I guess I'm feeling flat, depressed, out of ideas. I'm not a proper blogger which I guess is at least one of the reasons this isn't getting the popularity, support and comments the old place used to get. I have nothing to say and nothing to draw. On the positive side, I have a part in a play which will further reduce the time and desire necessary to keep this place ticking over. I know from reading and doing this for over two years now that most people at some point hit a wall of apathy, indifference, nothing-to-sayness, life in a rut and it's boring saying it over and over again.

I'll keep re-posting old stuff while there's still old stuff to post but that won't take very long. After that, if I still feel this flat and lifeless, I'll give this place a rest until my sails fill with wind and my head with ideas.

In the meantime, here's some art from a letter back in April or May...

letter art



From September 2004 when some weird stuff was going on in my head - well, in my eyes anyway - the world unravelling into ribbons of coloured light, or narrowing to a tunnel of light and pain. Apparently it was some kind of migraine and thankfully they moved on to bother some other poor sucker soon after they came.

26 October 2005

M. B-B in "The red and blue pills"

(From July 2004, the second 'Matrix' inspired M. B-B adventure...)


22 October 2005

Reverend 'Hypocrit' Stimson Preaches

(This, from July 2004, came about when somebody missed the point of the Proper Jobs strip and accused me of hypocrisy for listing 'Reverend' as a potential proper job...)


19 October 2005

M. B-B in "There Is No Spoon"


(From July 2004, after munching magic mushrooms then watching The Matrix for the first time ever...)

14 October 2005

Very Quickly

I've been depressed, largely due to an inability to sleep, and so here are some old things to fill the otherwise gloomy void (I;m feeling less depressed now 0 blame alcohol)...





(All from August 2004, when my brilliant daughter Petunia Petelbaum came to stay...)

7 October 2005

Hi Diddle Di Dee

(Originally posted July 2004 when I decided to dip my toe back into the tepid waters of provincial amateur dramatics...


...prompting pondering of some wrong ways...


...and an idea for a future right way for learning lines...


...and making some radical scalp revision necessary - incorporating more mushroom madness...


...though I never did draw or blog on mushrooms)

4 October 2005

Bespoke Blog Graphics (Suits You!)

So long ago I can't exactly remember when, I offered to help spruce up Caitlin's blog with some new graphics. For a variety of reasons, the stuff we came up with never got used but recently they were shown of on Caitlin's blog and so I feel it's okay for me to show them off as well. Please feel free to contact me if you feel your own web presence would benefit from a Guild of Ghostwriters makeover.

Caitlin's idea was to have an image playing on a second meaning of 'flat at the top of the stairs' and so I drafted a few ideas for her to pick from.




Caitlin preferred the final image but wanted something horizontal to go along the top of the blog.


I provided a selection of cat skins for her to pick from...


...and the blank cat was patterned to produce the final banner.


30 September 2005

So Long, Marianne










This, originally posted July 2004, was the fourth and (so far) final karaoke doodle. As with all the other songs, I claim no credit for the words which I obtained permission to use from Leonard Cohen's agent (as with all karaoke doodles except Heavenly Aeroplane where the words and music are listed as 'traditional' on the record sleeve). As I say every time (and one day I swear I'll make it true), I'll do some more of these when I find the time. All requests happily considered - email your suggestions.